Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Failure is Impossible

What would you have the courage to attempt if you knew failure was impossible?

Think about that for a minute.

Let that sink in.

Girls, I'll give you an easy start.
Dance for your husband.
And I'm not talkin' Tinkerbell dance recital dance either.


You may find this one of the most liberating and exhilerating experiences of your married life.

You can use your own creativity to come up with your own signature performance. Here's an idea for starters.

Take one of your older pair of jeans that you don't mind taking out of public circulation. If you think they are too tight, all the better. You want jeans that really hug your fanny but are not so tight as to be uncomfortable. You can even go to a resale shop and get the perfect pair for under ten bucks if the right pair of jeans is not currently in your closet.

Put them on.
In private. In front of a mirror.
You're going to cut them into shorts. Not shorts you can wear to your kids soccer game, either. Seriously short shorts. Obscenely short. Too short to wear in public.
Take a pen and mark where you want to cut them into shorts. Just a little mark. Take the jeans off. Go down about an inch or two from where you drew the cutting mark. This will allow room for fringe. Cut the jean legs off to make cutoff shorts. You're going for a look that's a little bit Daisy Duke a little bit Marianne and a little bit Ginger. You can use scissors to cut the jeans. You can use a knife if you're VERY careful and you want to make little ragged fringey I've been stuck on a desert island kind of edge to the denim.

Okay, you've got the shorts.

Next, the top.
There are several options.
But first, the most important bit of clothing.
Your bra. You need a good bra with lots of support and lift and cleavage. Doesn't matter if the bra itself is kind of plain without much lace and adornment. Just lift up the girls!

Okay, the top. This is where it gets fun. You could buy a camisole one size too small on purpose. You could buy a buttonup denim vest at the same resale shop you bought the old faded jeans you just cut up. You could wear that peasant blouse you wore 2 summers ago but haven't thrown out. Anything small and dainty that shows off your cleavage. And if you're concious of your tummy from baby stretch marks or something, don't crop the top. Whatever makes you feel comfortable.

If you feel like it, you can wear shoes or boots or whatever. Shoes are TOTALLY not necessary but can be a fun option.

Now. You're almost ready to dance.

Girls, here is the huge couragemaking confidenceboosting truth.
It is impossible for you to fail.
Success is guaranteed and failure is not a remote possibility.
You playfully own your sexuality and grow your comfort zone.
Your man gets the incredibly hot experience of having his wife tantalize him in a way that he has surely fantasized about. And the added bonus, is the whole damn thing is a guilt-free pleasure! For both of you!

Now, some of you may not really consider yourselves dancers.
That is SO okay.
I've got a workaround for that.

Jessica Simpson did a rendition of that old song These Boots are Made for Walkin' and believe me ladies, you leaving him will be the last thing on either of your minds. The beauty of this song for first time tantalizers is it has a nice slow easy beat and if you don't know many dance moves, all you have to do to "get it" is just listen to the music, feel the beat, look him in the eye and strut and saunter around the floor. You don't even need boots.

Now don't go all perfectionistic on yourself and practice it to death trying to make it perfect. This is not Star Search. This is Have Hot Fun At Home. But you may want to strut through the song once, by yourself, just to get into your groove. The first time I danced and strutted my stuff to this song felt effinfabulous!

Remember girls, failure is impossible.

How do I know?

I just know.


Please my darlings do not let your heart become distracted by thoughts of comparing your body to Jessica or anybody else. Own your own hotness. Share it with your husband. Go for it!


Cocotte said...

That is a fantastic idea about the shorts. I'm going to have to look thru my closet. And I always lift the girls, so that's an easy one for me! LOL!

You pointed out the most important lesson already - be confident about yourself. You don't have to be a professional dancer to make your husband go wild with lust for ya!

Who am I said...

This is an awesome post and I love your attitude.

Still puzzled how to help my wife understand how her attitude is more important in her sex appeal to me than her specific body measurements and weight.

Nurse Betty L. Boop said...


Eleutheros said...


I bought my precious one a plain, soft, white cotton XL mens shirt for Christmas last year.

She was puzzled until I suggested she take everything off and put this on. And when she did and saw her voluptuous beauty in the mirror, enhanced by the simplicity of it all, well...

That evening, after a good bottle of Christmas cheer, on goes Def Leppard, (those boys seem to know a thing or two about what makes the feminine heart tick) and I could see my enraptured delight in the evening's entertainment reflected in my precious one's countenance, which was definately lifted up and flashing, firey and passionate.

Merry Christmas, lover!

*sigh* I just love being human.

Thanks for inspiring the memory and giving me cause to share it.

With agape,