There was an article here that I really liked. It was very raw and vulnerable and I had a hard time posting it because it was about me experiencing an episode of depression when I quit taking the full dose of medication. The article compared taking medication that God has provided so I can be healthy and whole and alive physically and emotionally.....and taking communion as a reminder of the atonement that God has provided for me so I can be spiritually healthy and whole.
If part of the healing God has provided for me is a maintenance dose of antidepressant, I need to be humble and grateful and take it. Who am I to send a plateful of healing back to the master chef asking for a smaller serving?
I went to edit the article to change just a teeny word or two. I wanted to copy and paste it to save it offline. When I shift-clicked to select the whole article, the whole thing dissapeared. And a split second later, blogger autosaved my newly emptied article. Oh the horror!
I could try to re-create the article and I think I will because I think it served as an important reminder that the lovely moments I post about here are not without cost. I don't live in a scot-free pink haze of joy and pleasure. But often, quite often, when I stick with the painful growth process, God surprizes me with joy so lush that I can't help but write about it. I am redeemed. and I can't shut up about it.
But I think it's important to show, even at my own vulnerable expense, that all joy has a cost. My deep hope is that all of you will pay the high cost of growing in your own lives and reap the joy. I want that so bad for all of you I can't tell you how much. Wiping tears as I type, SensuousWife