Saturday, December 22, 2007

Widen my World

Today was my ideal mailbox experience. Nothing in my mailbox except netflix DVDs and Christmas cards! No bills. I did a little whoop of joy right there standing in front of the mailbox.

Once I got inside the house, I sat down on the couch and absorbed the Christmas cards like sweet sweet wine. Several people are sending pictures this year. It's getting cheaper and easier to do picture cards and I love seeing my friends!

One card from a girlfriend who moved last winter. When I saw the picture of her and her husband and their two little daughters, I cried for joy. The girls are captivating and it was good to see them growing but the thing that delighted me the most was the serene calm confident look on my friend's face. The year before had been difficult for her and it was glorious to see her face because I could tell by her demeanor that she had hit her stride. I knew from the few letters we had exchanged that during the past year, her baby had become a toddler, her toddler had become a preschooler, and her broke medical school fellow husband had become a well paid and celebrated new partner. My dear girlfriend is no longer a broke stressed out mom with a new baby and a toddler. In that moment, I could see all our prayers for her family from the last 3 years had been answered. Life is not perfect for her (or anyone else for that matter) but God honored her years of sacrifice by giving her financial and parenting relief and I rejoiced for her.

One card from some friends we met this year. These friends enjoy words as much as I do, so the greeting they penned on the inside of the card was heartwarming and made me smile through tears. The artwork on the card was breathtaking.

Another card from friends who sent us a fruit basket. Which is so sweet and old-fashioned and nobody does that kind of thing anymore. But she's classy like that. This aint the fruitbaskets from raffles either! These were gourmet pears from Oregon nested in individual foam containers to keep them from bruising. Other goodies like pecans and chocolate-covered cherries made this box a real hit with our family. The sweetest treat was the letter which basically said "We know we don't talk very often but we love you very very much."

Y'all I sat on my sofa and cried. I realized there are so many people that love me...who I also love and I had little to no time to talk to them this year. I'm so grateful for my friends and I want to make more time for them in the new year.

I realized my world is too small. Work>Home>MamaCircuit>HubbyTime with a weekly spiritual pit stop to refuel at Church and an hour of GirlfriendTime.

Nothing wrong with any of those. But my world is too small. Next year my world promises to expand. Some delightful stuff is going to be added to my dance card next year, recurring events including a Girlfriends Scrapbooking Club and a Ladies Worship Dance Guild. I am SO looking forward to widening my world a bit. Pondering how I can better stay in touch with some of these out of town friends AND adding some local FUN stuff, thank God. Cause work will eat my lunch if I let it.

Do you see any opportunities to widen your world in 2008?
What kind of nourishing intentional community can you add to your dance card next year?
Treat yourself.
Once you get our there and engage, your heart will be a blessing to others.

Thursday, December 20, 2007

SOME lingerie you DON'T wear to your kids' soccer games

Christmas is for children. As moms, we do whatever we can to make Christmas quality time memories with our kids...baking cookies (even if slice-and-bake) and cuddling on the sofa reading stories. Not to mention standing in line at the crack of dawn trying to find a Wii or whatever fun toy they have their heart set on. It's a lot of work, but it's a joy.
But if we don't be careful, the whole extra mile Mom thing will run us ragged.
Ladies, you've got to save some space in your mind, in your heart, and in your calendar for some adult husband/wife playtime with your Honey. Few things help me switch gears into adult husband/wife mindset like lingerie. And I'm not talking about the everyday beautiful stuff I wear under my soccer mom outfits either. I'm talking something special.
Not just lingerie, giftwrap. If you know what I mean. ;0

Something sassy, like this Candy Cane Corset from Hips and Curves is what I'm talkin' about. Stepping into the bathroom or dressing room and putting on this little number is the equivalent of Superman stepping into the phone booth. You'll feel the change in your heart when you see yourself in the mirror. Remembering what a gorgeous sexy woman you really are.

If you like your sexy soft and elegant, this long gown is charming elegant and sexy all at the same time. Like you.

If you don't want to spend a lot of dough, Frederick's has sexy elegant sheer lace babydolls for $22. And Georgette babydolls for $20.

Victoria's has got some beautiful stuff this season. Delighted Husband took me shopping there this week and I was dazzled by all the color and style they've got goin' on. This lace trim babydoll is only $26.50.

Whatever your personal style, choose something that makes you feel sexy and confident. Then be the gift! -SW

Tuesday, December 18, 2007

Never Underestimate the Healing Power of Massage

Never underestimate the healing power of massage.
Even in the busy holiday season.
Especially then.
It may be erotic. It may be more nurturing and comforting. Either way, get some massage oil and make an appointment with your man for a massage. And ladies, especially you workin' moms like me, don't be afraid to ask for a massage. Don't be afraid you'll look selfish. You won't. He happens to LIKE touching your body after all! Oh and if you're stressed out and tired and achy, you'll be doing your whole family a favor to ask your husband for a massage. The kids will notice, "Mommy dissapears for a while and then Mommy is all relaxed and happy and loosey goosey" You'll be a more cuddly approachable less stressed mom afterwards. And what a great lesson the two of you are teaching them by example. You're teaching them that husbands and wives give each other massages and that being cuddled and touched makes people into nicer people. Good lifelong lessons.
See! You're not being selfish. You're teaching your kids lifelong lessons about marriage.
And your husband will enjoy it.
How do I know?
I just know. :)

Thursday, December 13, 2007

There's so much love in the world

There's so much love in the world.
Yesterday I sat cuddled into an overstuffed sofa in a living room with 4 of my favorite girlfriends. We had been meeting together for lunch on Wednesdays saving the day for each other and for ourselves, and we were taking a break for Christmas. Knowing we wouldn't see each other for a few weeks we took the time to take inventory. Each woman thought back over the last few months and took inventory of her heart and her life and paid attention to what changes had taken place since we started getting together regularly to pray for and love on each other. We were all beautifully surprized.
I certainly was.
Here is what I learned:
Life is not either/or. It's both/and.
I used to think that people were either one or the other. Either needy and falling apart at the seams or confident and having all your shit together having come thorugh life unscathed. I know it sounds ridiculous and extreme to say it so plainly. But in my heart, that is what I really believed. In order to have something to offer, I had to have it all together and travel through life unscathed. and you and I both know that is not the way I've traveled!
But I've learned a bigger truth.
I've seen firsthand women come as they are and have something beautiful to offer every time. Whether it's a beautiful need expressed in humble honesty. Or a beautiful comfort that is a joy for them to offer.
Paul, that old stinker, figured this out lonnnnng ago.
He put it this way, "We hold this treasure in earthen jars to show that the power is beyond ourselves cause it belongs to God."
What a beautiful relief!
I am a verrrry earthy vessel. (as y'all know)
and I carry within me a verrrrry gorgeous pricey treasure.
It's both/and.
:) SW

Friday, December 7, 2007

Defining Moment

Recently I faced one of those rare moments that are not about "just getting through it" or pass/fail apologize and move on. It was one of those solemn moments where life hangs in the balance and everything important comes into razor sharp focus.

This song was going through my mind at the time.

It was prophetic. And surreal. How many moments in your life have a soundtrack playing in real time?

Alison Krauss' breathy clear haunting voice matched the grave, solemn moment perfectly.

What a dying world
the reasons we strive to exist
Refrain control
or we're bound to learn
the meaning of moments like this

Cause in the peaceful lull
the quiet spell
Seduced by the promise of bliss
We soon forget
nothing's happened yet
we're living for moments like this

So hold me
whisper gently
this is what we live for
how we learn who we are

It defines us
ever reminding us
that life never is
more precious than this

from the dim light
in the greyness
the aim of the soul tends to miss
But then the clouds catch fire
and the oceans pitch
we're made for moments like this

So hold me
whisper gently
that there's nothing to fear
that you'll always be near
to remind me
stand behind me
although life can be rough
we can never give up.

It's in our power
to face the storm
with all it's fury
and madness
The flash of thunder
will be harnessed with
the longing and sadness
The clouds will grey

So hold me
whisper gently
this is what we live for
how we learn who we are
It defines us
ever reminding us
that life never is
more precious than this.

So hold me
whisper gently
that there's nothing to fear
that you'll always be here
to remind me
stand behind me
although life can be rough
we can never give up.

I can't emphasize enough....that in those split second moments in life where everything hangs in the balance and I simply must be strong, there is no time to go process with a friend, get a hug, cry on someone's shoulder. Those times come later. In my pivotal, critical, defining moment, it's only to the God who lives within me that I can say "Hold me, whisper gently that there's nothing to fear and you'll always be near." I better carry within me an orchard, cause one day I'm gonna get hungry.

Last weekend I was dazzled by the power of God welled and reserved inside of me. There are moments where a preternatural hush comes over your soul and you stand in a dignity and grace that comes from God. The pain is excruciating. Everything in your heart is demanded—and everything in your heart is enough.

It's in our power
to face the storm
with all it's fury
and madness

but the power only comes out when we face the storm and face the fury and madness.

Tuesday, December 4, 2007


Lamentations 3:22
"It is because of the Lord's great mercy that we are not consumed."

Saturday, December 1, 2007

Keep on doin' what you're doin'. It's workin'! It's workin'!

Delighted Husband went to our first Christmas shindig of the season. A fancy affair. And a rare occasion to see Delighted Husband in a suit and tie. Hubba, hubba! Unfair how hot that man can look with such minimal effort.

The evening turned out well, thanks solely to the prayers of my girlfriends. I was not feeling very sensuous yesterday. Not all all. I wanted to go hide in my cave of sinful self-protection and just camp there. Bring an inflatable mattress and stay a while. That's what I wanted to do. Mostly. But a part of me knew what I was doing. Knew my sulky thoughts would only achieve me shooting myself in the foot. So I asked them to pray. Y'all know who you are. ;)
And it worked.
One dear girlfriend sent me this video.
And it was like a light went off inside me. "Feel the rain on your skin. No one else can feel it for you." Y'all it was clear as day. I had this opportunity to shine and enjoy myself doing it. Or I could ruin the whole thing, rob myself of the joy just to pull some childish selfprotecting stunt. I listened to Miss Natasha sing and began to dance in my kitchen. I picked up the phone for the salon and made an appointment. I began the preflight checklist of getting Mega Dolled Up.

Another girlfriend sent me a note that said, "I would never think any less of you! Even the hottest wifey has days where she feels like something other then a sex kitten!
Will pray for you...done deal.
Now, you know your dh loves his hottie wife.
Start this day doing something positive...something you absolutely love. Then think How exciting to have a fun dress up party to go to. Will your hubby be wearing a tux or simply black tie ordeal?
Knock 'em dead, SW"

I was an hour late getting to the salon. An hour late. The Beloved Children pulled a stunt that I could not ignore so I had to stay home and work through it with them. Which drained me emotionally and physically. Anger kills arousal as I've told y'all already. And I was both sad and angry at the choices they had made. I finally got the kids squared away and in a positive groove with the babysitter and I left for the salon. I listened to Unwritten on my mp3 player all the way to the salon. The salon wasn't too busy THANK GOD so they could still work me in even though I was an hour late.

The more the dear salon ladies worked on me, the prettier I looked and the better I felt. I don't know if it's the sense of feeling gorgeous after being waxed and exfoliated and painted and filed....or if it's the nurturing emotion of feeling cared for by my self and the dear salon ladies. Probably both.

So when I got home I still had to do my hair since there was no time for a hair appointment. I was rushing to wash and dry my hair while Delighted Husband stood there looking all gorgeous and antsy to go. I felt like I was in a fire drill or some game show. Having to hurry that much does NOT feel sexy! I felt SO put on the spot. I managed to whip my hair into shape in record time and we scoot out the door. I almost forget my shoes and jewelry.

We finally get out to the car. I haven't even gotten around to makeup. I try to put it on in the car. Delighted Husband swerves to avoid an accident and the makeup bag on my lap slides off my lap and spills onto the floor, lipsticks and stuff everywhere. Delighted Husband pulls over and we grope blindly in the dark trying to identify tiny vials and tubes of makeup. We think we finally got it all, so he takes off again. We are an hour late for his corporate shindig which is bad form and has DH nervous.

We arrive and are greeted warmly by DH's employees and co-workers. They have saved us a seat. We enjoy the meal-they are always so good-and enjoy the conversation. I must have looked really beautiful because I kept getting dirty looks from some of the ladies and smiles from most of the men. Funny thing about cocktail dresses. You show some festive Christmas cleavage and some women tell you look great and some women look at you like they want you to drop dead. Of course DH looked at me like I was a new Ferrari. I began to relax and enjoy myself, enjoy the conversations. By this point I am SO glad I chose to not stay in Camp Sinful Self Protection. And Miss Natasha would be proud because in my own way, I am "feeling the rain on my skin because no one else can feel it for me". I turn flirting with my husband into an Olympic sport. I don't say much, but he can just FEEL me wanting him and loving him and shining my light on him. I'm feeling my glory and directing it all towards my husband.

As we approach the bar, an elderly bartender gives me the highest praise I've ever gotten from a man I'm not married to. He says, "Miss girl, keep on doin' what ya doin'. It's workin! It's workin!"

We blush all the way to the car.