Dr. Oz, a physician on the Oprah show says a recent study showed that if you have 200 orgasms a year you'll be physiologically 6 years younger.
By the time Delighted Husband and I have been married for 50 years, physiologically, I'll barely be old enough to have a driver's license!
Tuesday, June 26, 2007
Monday, June 25, 2007
Care-less Contralto (the stage becomes a playground)
I sing for the sensation of notes reverberating in my throat.
I sing for the balance of my feet securely beneath me.
I sing for the joy of hearing the aural beauty I'm creating on-the-fly.
I sing to soak in the pleasure of the Spirit's spotlight enfolding me like a velvet mist.
I sing for the comforting integrity of singing notes that are true.
and if others in the audience enjoy my song, I savor our collective experience of being human.
If a tree falls in the woods
and no one is around
do the sound waves translate into noise without the waves hitting an eardrum?
No. Not really.
But by giving us lungs for breath
nasal cavities for tone
larynx lips and tongue for vocalization
eardrums to translate our vocal waves into notes
God created in us the complete package
capable of generating and hearing vocal sound
and experiencing pleasure in both the singing and the hearing.
Each duet is really two solos.
No one can push breath of my larynx but me.
But tandem solos are fun!
I sing for the balance of my feet securely beneath me.
I sing for the joy of hearing the aural beauty I'm creating on-the-fly.
I sing to soak in the pleasure of the Spirit's spotlight enfolding me like a velvet mist.
I sing for the comforting integrity of singing notes that are true.
and if others in the audience enjoy my song, I savor our collective experience of being human.
If a tree falls in the woods
and no one is around
do the sound waves translate into noise without the waves hitting an eardrum?
No. Not really.
But by giving us lungs for breath
nasal cavities for tone
larynx lips and tongue for vocalization
eardrums to translate our vocal waves into notes
God created in us the complete package
capable of generating and hearing vocal sound
and experiencing pleasure in both the singing and the hearing.
Each duet is really two solos.
No one can push breath of my larynx but me.
But tandem solos are fun!
Thursday, June 21, 2007
Mezzo-Soprano (the Diva's goin' down)
I skip to the stage of a packed house
Jesus Christ, son of David, have mercy on me
I sing my delight to an audience of one
Jesus Christ, son of David, have mercy on me
Opening night of splendor and glory
Jesus Christ, son of David, have mercy on me
Beaming out light with playful delight
Jesus Christ, son of David, have mercy on me
Breath of great joy-a shimmering high note
Jesus Christ, son of David, have mercy on me
When I hit my high note the audience walks out
Jesus Christ, son of David, have mercy on me
Note dies in my throat-packed house becomes empty
just. like. that.
But humming in the kitchen is okay.
Jesus Christ, son of David, have mercy on me
I sing my delight to an audience of one
Jesus Christ, son of David, have mercy on me
Opening night of splendor and glory
Jesus Christ, son of David, have mercy on me
Beaming out light with playful delight
Jesus Christ, son of David, have mercy on me
Breath of great joy-a shimmering high note
Jesus Christ, son of David, have mercy on me
When I hit my high note the audience walks out
Jesus Christ, son of David, have mercy on me
Note dies in my throat-packed house becomes empty
just. like. that.
But humming in the kitchen is okay.
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
Portraits of Brave and Holy Sensuousness - Esther and Mr. Esther
Esther of Judah and her husband whom I'll call Mr. Esther shared this story on TMB. I'm retelling their story here with her permission. All I can say is I'll never look at an art supply shop again without smiling. Wow and meow. -SW
On a snowy evening while my husband and I were sequestered in a chalet, we had a late night craft session. Covering the floor with drop cloths, we positioned a canvas in front of the fire place. As we listened to jazz and sipped wine, we opened the body paint containers (purchased colors which matched our bedroom back home), painted each other (very erotic foreplay), rolled around together in the paint, and made love on the canvas. After having a marvelous time painting his mighty manhood and "stamping" the canvas, I wiped him off before penetration removing most of the paint which minimized the color from entering my "hoo-haa". I had no irritation after our craft night. Yee Hah! As for price, we purchased our supplies in Europe while traveling. We purchased the body paint at a novelty shop. I think, it was latex body paint I think, for canvas and paints it was about $100. Framing the masterpiece was the most expensive part of the project. It turned out to be a fabulous evening. However, I must admit, when I viewed the paints and put the idea out to him, he intially rolled his eyes.
Perhaps, I am the more artistic and adventurous one. But, because he chose to break out of his comfort zone, it was quite the evening. One we will never forget. One which caused us to grow closer together. One.
When we were done doing each other we ended up creating a masterpiece that hangs above our bedroom fireplace. It is our reminder of an extremely intimate get-away. The layout of our home is such that our bedroom is tucked away. So, many guests never view our secret mastererpiece, Bliss in the Alps.
This story makes me say "You go, girl!" and "Good for you, Big Fella!" and"Wow, God your generosity is way too much but we'll take it anyway"
On a snowy evening while my husband and I were sequestered in a chalet, we had a late night craft session. Covering the floor with drop cloths, we positioned a canvas in front of the fire place. As we listened to jazz and sipped wine, we opened the body paint containers (purchased colors which matched our bedroom back home), painted each other (very erotic foreplay), rolled around together in the paint, and made love on the canvas. After having a marvelous time painting his mighty manhood and "stamping" the canvas, I wiped him off before penetration removing most of the paint which minimized the color from entering my "hoo-haa". I had no irritation after our craft night. Yee Hah! As for price, we purchased our supplies in Europe while traveling. We purchased the body paint at a novelty shop. I think, it was latex body paint I think, for canvas and paints it was about $100. Framing the masterpiece was the most expensive part of the project. It turned out to be a fabulous evening. However, I must admit, when I viewed the paints and put the idea out to him, he intially rolled his eyes.
Perhaps, I am the more artistic and adventurous one. But, because he chose to break out of his comfort zone, it was quite the evening. One we will never forget. One which caused us to grow closer together. One.When we were done doing each other we ended up creating a masterpiece that hangs above our bedroom fireplace. It is our reminder of an extremely intimate get-away. The layout of our home is such that our bedroom is tucked away. So, many guests never view our secret mastererpiece, Bliss in the Alps.
This story makes me say "You go, girl!" and "Good for you, Big Fella!" and"Wow, God your generosity is way too much but we'll take it anyway"
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
Sex and Worship: the doctor(s) are in
I'll be talking about this subject a lot from time to time. Just remembered a great article I read not too long ago with some great insight. The author interviewed 4 sex therapists who are in private practice together in Atlanta. One of the therapists is the oft-quoted Dr. Rosenau whose book happily resides on my recommended list. Here's what they had to say:
[quote]
Q: You talk about worshiping God through sex. How can couples embrace that idea?
A: Christopher: Connect it to the scriptural principle of feasts. In the Old Testament God ordained feasts to celebrate his glory. What's a feast? It's eating sumptuous foods, drinking fine wines. If you do that without the right spirit, you get gluttony and drunkenness, and God is certainly not going to be worshiped. But if you worship in a feast while still having discipline, still having boundaries, God says he's greatly glorified.
Marital union is meant to be a feast—look at the Song of Songs. There's so much metaphor that is about feasting and fine wines and good rich foods. See it as another type of bodily feast as the two "consume" each other. It's the consummation of their oneness. They offer themselves for consummation, and God is glorified.
A: Doug: And that requires making sure couples give themselves permission to learn those disciplines—the discipline of feasting, of playfulness, of sensuality—and give themselves permission to be erotic, to be truly naked and unashamed.
A: Michael: A couple can really drink in and enjoy each other. But that means they have to slow down. They have to tune in to the sensuality of it, which is part of the beauty of it all.
Q: So just to bring this all back around. Playful sex can be worshipful sex?
A: Debra: Oh, yeah.
A: Michael: Very highly.
Q: Comfort sex can be worshipful sex.
A: Debra: Oh, yes.
Q: Quickie sex can be worshipful sex?
A: Debra: Yes, yes.
A: Christopher: Because we're talking about making love, not simply having sex, and it's flowing out of the rest of the spirit of the marriage. If they've been playful throughout the day, with little kitchen hugs, and notes in the lunch, or phone calls, or e-mails, or anything that is playful and loving—not necessarily sexual—then it naturally connects.
A: Doug: Structured optimal time for sex, such as every Friday night, can be worshipful like going to church from 10:30 to 12:00 on Sunday morning. But if all we have is structured time with God and never just hang out and "waste" time with him, we're probably never going to have the worship we'd like. Sometimes you have to do more than that 15 minutes or 45 minutes and have that wasting time together. It's all worshipful, but sometimes to get the connecting, intimate worship, you've got to do the extended time, too."
Dontcha just love that? Those guys and gal have got it goin' on! Heads and hearts in the right place and some counseling and marriage experience to boot!
The emphasis on Christopher's comment was mine, when he said "and it's flowing out of the rest of the spirit of the marriage." I think that's important. For many reasons. First of all, it's important that we are loving and enjoying and honoring and caring for our spouse all the time, not just while making love, and that we do so with an attitude of thankfulness and joy towards God. Second of all, I'm a wife and I write about hot married sex from that perspective. When I've experienced unfettered joy and worship during sex it was sex with my husband. Funny the details I forgot to mention when I was all starry-eyed and typing a mile-a-minute! -SW
[quote]
Q: You talk about worshiping God through sex. How can couples embrace that idea?
A: Christopher: Connect it to the scriptural principle of feasts. In the Old Testament God ordained feasts to celebrate his glory. What's a feast? It's eating sumptuous foods, drinking fine wines. If you do that without the right spirit, you get gluttony and drunkenness, and God is certainly not going to be worshiped. But if you worship in a feast while still having discipline, still having boundaries, God says he's greatly glorified.
Marital union is meant to be a feast—look at the Song of Songs. There's so much metaphor that is about feasting and fine wines and good rich foods. See it as another type of bodily feast as the two "consume" each other. It's the consummation of their oneness. They offer themselves for consummation, and God is glorified.
A: Doug: And that requires making sure couples give themselves permission to learn those disciplines—the discipline of feasting, of playfulness, of sensuality—and give themselves permission to be erotic, to be truly naked and unashamed.
A: Michael: A couple can really drink in and enjoy each other. But that means they have to slow down. They have to tune in to the sensuality of it, which is part of the beauty of it all.
Q: So just to bring this all back around. Playful sex can be worshipful sex?
A: Debra: Oh, yeah.
A: Michael: Very highly.
Q: Comfort sex can be worshipful sex.
A: Debra: Oh, yes.
Q: Quickie sex can be worshipful sex?
A: Debra: Yes, yes.
A: Christopher: Because we're talking about making love, not simply having sex, and it's flowing out of the rest of the spirit of the marriage. If they've been playful throughout the day, with little kitchen hugs, and notes in the lunch, or phone calls, or e-mails, or anything that is playful and loving—not necessarily sexual—then it naturally connects.
A: Doug: Structured optimal time for sex, such as every Friday night, can be worshipful like going to church from 10:30 to 12:00 on Sunday morning. But if all we have is structured time with God and never just hang out and "waste" time with him, we're probably never going to have the worship we'd like. Sometimes you have to do more than that 15 minutes or 45 minutes and have that wasting time together. It's all worshipful, but sometimes to get the connecting, intimate worship, you've got to do the extended time, too."
Dontcha just love that? Those guys and gal have got it goin' on! Heads and hearts in the right place and some counseling and marriage experience to boot!
The emphasis on Christopher's comment was mine, when he said "and it's flowing out of the rest of the spirit of the marriage." I think that's important. For many reasons. First of all, it's important that we are loving and enjoying and honoring and caring for our spouse all the time, not just while making love, and that we do so with an attitude of thankfulness and joy towards God. Second of all, I'm a wife and I write about hot married sex from that perspective. When I've experienced unfettered joy and worship during sex it was sex with my husband. Funny the details I forgot to mention when I was all starry-eyed and typing a mile-a-minute! -SW
Friday, June 15, 2007
Sex as an act of worship
It's so cool how someone else's sharing can call forth something you want to share. I read a post on this subject over at Spiritual Sensuality and immediately my words and thoughts spilled eagerly onto the page. I didn't have to bite my lip or squinch up my eyebrows and trytocomeupwithsomething. It was just there, waiting to be said. So thank you, Lydia.
This is a concept very near and dear to my heart. I've been writing about this topic for years as I've spent the last fifteen years surrendering to Jesus and letting him heal me from sexual abuse and all kinds of junk. After fifteen years I finally have the courage to believe that all this journaling I've shared up till now only with God, my therapist, my husband and spiritual director that I could be unshamed and confident enough to share with other people. (smile) that's you! :)
So all this journaling on sex and worship is shaping into a devotional book titled Erotic Mystic: Musings on God and Sex. When you look at this topic from the perspective of an "old married lady" LOL who's been making love to the same man for ten years, this subject is common to nearly everyone. Why do you think most of us cry out the word "OH MY GOD" at the point of orgasm? It's because in the face of something so beautifully overwhelming we reach for God. To anchor us in the midst of such dizzying pleasure and to receive our thanks. I believe that crying out to God from the depth of our being is worship.
There is more to this subject than that-(I seem to think so anyway cause I've been wrestling with or celebrating the subject for 15 years)-but I thought the OMG cry at climax shows what a common human experience sex and worship often is. -SW
This is a concept very near and dear to my heart. I've been writing about this topic for years as I've spent the last fifteen years surrendering to Jesus and letting him heal me from sexual abuse and all kinds of junk. After fifteen years I finally have the courage to believe that all this journaling I've shared up till now only with God, my therapist, my husband and spiritual director that I could be unshamed and confident enough to share with other people. (smile) that's you! :)
So all this journaling on sex and worship is shaping into a devotional book titled Erotic Mystic: Musings on God and Sex. When you look at this topic from the perspective of an "old married lady" LOL who's been making love to the same man for ten years, this subject is common to nearly everyone. Why do you think most of us cry out the word "OH MY GOD" at the point of orgasm? It's because in the face of something so beautifully overwhelming we reach for God. To anchor us in the midst of such dizzying pleasure and to receive our thanks. I believe that crying out to God from the depth of our being is worship.
There is more to this subject than that-(I seem to think so anyway cause I've been wrestling with or celebrating the subject for 15 years)-but I thought the OMG cry at climax shows what a common human experience sex and worship often is. -SW
Friday, June 8, 2007
Desire (Un)Defined
I've been following Pro Deo Sum's discussion on whether or not to go to church. And I'm being really challenged by it. On the surface this may not seem to have anything to do with marriage, but it's been my experience that this dynamic has a heckuva lot to do with marriage. To me, marriage is all about taking all the love, joy, energy and goodness you have and pouring it all over each other every day. If you don't have passion for life then it's difficult to have passion for making love. I've found the love of God to be a proven source for renewing my passion for life. But how to experience that love in community? mmm...I have a lot to learn.
My friend Dena was talking about this dynamic and she said, "Now you're asking good questions...! We don't need "weekly fellowship"... we need LIFE, and He is the way, the truth and the LIFE. We need HIM, and part of being in Him, is being His Body (we, in this highly-individualized society we live in barely understand just how much we NEED one another to live this life!). We each need what each and every other believers has to give, which is of Him. They need what we have to give. We need to connect, as often as He leads, in order to experience Body life. We have to yearn for intimacy with one another, to intentionally pursue relationships that are real, connecting, challenging, fufilling, even invasive. Look at the book of Acts -- they met together as often as possible, to do life, not to "have meetings." Ask Him to knit you together with others of His choosing, which will bless your socks off, challenge your very core, and enable you to experience Him in a very tangible way."
This has been on my heart lately. Especially today. The paradox between needing God and needing other people. I understand the bit about not putting your confidence in man. About not making idols out of people and expecting them to be your God.
However, another truth is steadily attempting to grab my attention and that is: that not everybody is called to go live in the relational wilderness like Grizzly Adams saying "I can get whatever I need just me and God".
THis is so hard to understand and even harder to express so bear with me.
This morning I was praying and praying that verse "like the night watchman waits for the dawn, so my soul longs for you O God.". and I was telling the Lord how much I needed him and needed to sense his prescence and love today. (I know theologically he is always there but I need him to give me the grace to recognize it and perceive it to open my eyes like elijah said 'open his eyes lord' and then elisha could see all the hundreds of angels that were already there.) So anyway, I was just crying out to God and then I said "Lord, I don't want to say this cause I don't want to sound immature like I don't get it because I know you're here and I know you're all I need but Lord I just need to confess to you, God I am so dang lonely." and I didn't sense any conviction from the Holy Spirit like I had said something wrong and it felt really good to be honest.
This paradox is intricately linked to DH & my search for a new church home because I am totally rethinking "what do I need?" from God and from people he puts in my life and from a new home church. I mean to find what you're looking for you have to know what you're looking for. KWIM? Like that proverb that says "a desire fulfilled is sweet to the soul" and I would add "a desire undefined is maddening and nigh impossible to fulfill"
One of the key things I know for sure that DH and I need is the chance to offer our hearts to others and have it received. God has done so much in our lives, our marriages and our hearts and it has just become unbearable to offer that to friends at church and have it not received.
It's almost like I need permission from God to ask for this level of intimacy in friendships because it's so rare and I've been told it's immature to ask for this because I should get everything I need from my personal worship time with God. Like I'm selfish if I ask for more. But then I think well we ARE the body of Christ so if we get what we need from Christ then perchance that would involve another human?
and if you can make any sense out of this post then the gift of wisdom and discernment is surely in operation today!
-SW
My friend Dena was talking about this dynamic and she said, "Now you're asking good questions...! We don't need "weekly fellowship"... we need LIFE, and He is the way, the truth and the LIFE. We need HIM, and part of being in Him, is being His Body (we, in this highly-individualized society we live in barely understand just how much we NEED one another to live this life!). We each need what each and every other believers has to give, which is of Him. They need what we have to give. We need to connect, as often as He leads, in order to experience Body life. We have to yearn for intimacy with one another, to intentionally pursue relationships that are real, connecting, challenging, fufilling, even invasive. Look at the book of Acts -- they met together as often as possible, to do life, not to "have meetings." Ask Him to knit you together with others of His choosing, which will bless your socks off, challenge your very core, and enable you to experience Him in a very tangible way."
This has been on my heart lately. Especially today. The paradox between needing God and needing other people. I understand the bit about not putting your confidence in man. About not making idols out of people and expecting them to be your God.
However, another truth is steadily attempting to grab my attention and that is: that not everybody is called to go live in the relational wilderness like Grizzly Adams saying "I can get whatever I need just me and God".
THis is so hard to understand and even harder to express so bear with me.
This morning I was praying and praying that verse "like the night watchman waits for the dawn, so my soul longs for you O God.". and I was telling the Lord how much I needed him and needed to sense his prescence and love today. (I know theologically he is always there but I need him to give me the grace to recognize it and perceive it to open my eyes like elijah said 'open his eyes lord' and then elisha could see all the hundreds of angels that were already there.) So anyway, I was just crying out to God and then I said "Lord, I don't want to say this cause I don't want to sound immature like I don't get it because I know you're here and I know you're all I need but Lord I just need to confess to you, God I am so dang lonely." and I didn't sense any conviction from the Holy Spirit like I had said something wrong and it felt really good to be honest.
This paradox is intricately linked to DH & my search for a new church home because I am totally rethinking "what do I need?" from God and from people he puts in my life and from a new home church. I mean to find what you're looking for you have to know what you're looking for. KWIM? Like that proverb that says "a desire fulfilled is sweet to the soul" and I would add "a desire undefined is maddening and nigh impossible to fulfill"
One of the key things I know for sure that DH and I need is the chance to offer our hearts to others and have it received. God has done so much in our lives, our marriages and our hearts and it has just become unbearable to offer that to friends at church and have it not received.
It's almost like I need permission from God to ask for this level of intimacy in friendships because it's so rare and I've been told it's immature to ask for this because I should get everything I need from my personal worship time with God. Like I'm selfish if I ask for more. But then I think well we ARE the body of Christ so if we get what we need from Christ then perchance that would involve another human?
and if you can make any sense out of this post then the gift of wisdom and discernment is surely in operation today!
-SW
Monday, June 4, 2007
Art and the human spirit
Back from Austin and while I don't have time to give you the whole enchilada (or margarita!) I wanted to mention two works of art that really moved me while I was in Austin.
The first, a group of sculptures at Umlauf Sculpture Gallery.
The second was this amazing novel Love and Honor.
Both really really beautiful. I actually had tears in my eyes at this sculpture. They are SO in love and their mouths and pelvises are literally fused.
More later.
I just wanted to get this out there because now I'll have to finish it even if I get busy.
It was a soul-nourishing experience interacting with these artists' works.
More later.-SW
The first, a group of sculptures at Umlauf Sculpture Gallery.
The second was this amazing novel Love and Honor.
Both really really beautiful. I actually had tears in my eyes at this sculpture. They are SO in love and their mouths and pelvises are literally fused.
More later.
I just wanted to get this out there because now I'll have to finish it even if I get busy.
It was a soul-nourishing experience interacting with these artists' works.
More later.-SW
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